■"U.S. Files Charges In North Korean Counterfeit Probe," by Jay Solomon, Wall Street Journal, 12 October 2005, p. A3.

North Korea's been exporting counterfeit American bills for years, in very large quantities. A lot of it ends up in China (passed through Taiwan), which is why my wife and I carried large sums of uncirculated big American bills hidden in our shorts when we went to China last year to adopt baby Vonne Mei Ling Barnett.

Well, the U.S. has finally decided to do something formal about this:

In the latest move to break up North Korea's global criminal activities, the Justice Department indicted a leading member of an Irish Republican Army splinter group on charges of conspiring with Pyongyang to put millions of dollars of counterfeit U.S. currency into circulation in Eastern Europe and the United Kingdom.

Buddy, you can't bring that Gap trash into the Old Core! Maybe New Core China, where the rule sets are still embryonic on such things, but man! In the UK you're going to get busted if you start working with the IRA leftovers.

Now if we can start nabbing them on the bogus cigarettes and heroin, we'd be making some real progress.

One U.S. official put it well: "A country can't negotiate with you while also counterfeiting your currency."

Duh!